A Note from the Founder & CEO
The Invisible Storm
The storm kept on twisting…
Hello, my name is Tammy-Anne Deslongchamps. I am the mother of five amazing people. I became a mother at a very young age, having my two sons
by the time I was 19. Many years later, I had three little girls. For more than three decades, I moved through the cycle of harmful addictions.
Unfortunately, I wasn’t alone. My children suffered with me—and some of them still do.
I created The Deslongchamps Method for every person who is struggling through the nightmare of addiction, but especially for the children who suffer
alongside them.
alongside them.
I used to think my struggle was personal. I thought I had the time to figure myself out. But time passed, the kids grew older, and what I didn’t know then
was that my chances to get it right were slipping away. I learned the hard way that addiction is not an isolated reality. It was seeping through our lives
silently, elusively, and unnoticed into those I loved the most.
was that my chances to get it right were slipping away. I learned the hard way that addiction is not an isolated reality. It was seeping through our lives
silently, elusively, and unnoticed into those I loved the most.
As it went unnoticed, I navigated my way through the storm of addiction. Some days were smoother than others; some nights, I didn’t think I could make
it through. My logical self knew exactly what to do: Just stop drinking and abusing drugs! Simple! Yet just when I thought my logical mind had won, I’d
find myself right back in the eye of the storm.
it through. My logical self knew exactly what to do: Just stop drinking and abusing drugs! Simple! Yet just when I thought my logical mind had won, I’d
find myself right back in the eye of the storm.
I tried again to reason with myself, but I was baffled. I had no other choice than to declare myself insane. Nobody in their right mind would do what I was
doing, and it seemed impossible for me to stop. The standard medical field was telling me that it was hereditary—that my father was an alcoholic and he
passed it onto me.
doing, and it seemed impossible for me to stop. The standard medical field was telling me that it was hereditary—that my father was an alcoholic and he
passed it onto me.
I felt doomed. The storm kept on twisting, and I escaped a few more times.
The Legacy That Could Have Been
The burden passed on without my consent—or without me noticing.
You see, my father was an alcoholic. That was my reason for being one, too. And that worked for a bit… until one day.
I noticed that my sons were not doing well. They were on drugs, drinking, and partying with a dangerous intensity that dipped its toes into excess. They
seemed to take it one step further than most of their friends. I saw a hint of myself in them, and I have never been more scared than I was watching it unfold.
seemed to take it one step further than most of their friends. I saw a hint of myself in them, and I have never been more scared than I was watching it unfold.
I sat down and cried like I hadn’t cried in my entire life. Oh no. Not them, too. It was a reality that I would die fighting. It is one thing for me to suffer
through addiction, but it is a whole different reality when it comes after my children.
through addiction, but it is a whole different reality when it comes after my children.
My daughters experienced some of the turmoil, but nothing compared to my sons. They were able to get long glimpses of my sobriety, but it wasn’t
enough; they have had their struggles, too. And by then, it felt too late anyway. They were not listening. I had my chance, and now they were deep in
their own storms, entirely unaware of it.
enough; they have had their struggles, too. And by then, it felt too late anyway. They were not listening. I had my chance, and now they were deep in
their own storms, entirely unaware of it.
How bittersweet. There I was feeling and doing much better—the point where all of our problems were supposed to go away—and at that exact moment,
I knew I was too late.
I knew I was too late.
I have been safe from addiction for many years now, but some of my children were left behind in the storm. I try to reach out my hand to pull them out,
but the gale is too strong. I have cried many times since. I cried this morning for them.
but the gale is too strong. I have cried many times since. I cried this morning for them.
The legacy had been passed on—without my consent, and without me noticing.
Chasing Old Ghosts
…that didn’t want to be found.
My search for peace was a long one. I couldn’t just walk out of my life and find seclusion in a traditional rehab; that simply wasn’t an option for me.
I couldn’t go off to a rehab center and leave my world behind because I had too many responsibilities to walk away from.
I couldn’t go off to a rehab center and leave my world behind because I had too many responsibilities to walk away from.
Throughout my recovery process, which spanned close to 20 years, I reached a point where there was no one left to blame.
I was all that was left that I hadn’t examined. I had no choice but to look at myself through honest eyes—which I did for the very first time in my life.
I was all that was left that I hadn’t examined. I had no choice but to look at myself through honest eyes—which I did for the very first time in my life.
I walked to the bathroom, almost as if I was being led there, and locked the door behind me. I slowly leaned into the mirror, hesitantly.
I was curious, but at the same time, unsure of what I was doing. I looked myself deep in the eyes. I leaned in a bit further, so I could truly
look,and said, “Hello,” for the very first time in my life. It was as if I was meeting myself. That was the long beginning of the end to the
familiar nightmare I had known all my life.
I was curious, but at the same time, unsure of what I was doing. I looked myself deep in the eyes. I leaned in a bit further, so I could truly
look,and said, “Hello,” for the very first time in my life. It was as if I was meeting myself. That was the long beginning of the end to the
familiar nightmare I had known all my life.
For years I searched for solutions, finding one here and there that would offer some relief, then another, and another. It was slow but sure.
Through low lows and high highs, I was getting to know myself a little more every day.
Through low lows and high highs, I was getting to know myself a little more every day.
We’ve all got our reasons to feel like we are not good enough. I was determined. It wasn’t always easy, but I was fighting for my children now—
and that felt entirely different than fighting for myself.
and that felt entirely different than fighting for myself.
Years into my recovery process, there still wasn’t a clean, cold cut to my problems. The pattern was closer to falling down, laying there,
slowly picking myself up off the ground, dusting myself off, and taking another run at it over and over again. But with each new truth I came across,
the falls became fewer and the burden felt lighter, encouraging me to keep going.
slowly picking myself up off the ground, dusting myself off, and taking another run at it over and over again. But with each new truth I came across,
the falls became fewer and the burden felt lighter, encouraging me to keep going.
I was paying attention, though. Something inside me was feeling much better. I will not get into the nail-biting, scraping,
and clawing my way out of the hell I often found myself in. To tell you the truth, if I had known beforehand what I would have to do to stand here today,
I may not have done it. I will spare you those details to prevent you from getting overwhelmed; instead, I have built the answers into the very architecture
of The Deslongchamps Method.
and clawing my way out of the hell I often found myself in. To tell you the truth, if I had known beforehand what I would have to do to stand here today,
I may not have done it. I will spare you those details to prevent you from getting overwhelmed; instead, I have built the answers into the very architecture
of The Deslongchamps Method.
The Deslongchamps Method
Out of the darkness came a dream.
I knew addiction, and I knew it well. I knew both sides of it: being the one engaging in harmful behaviors, and being the helpless family member
watching the people I love struggle through theirs. To tell you the truth, it was much easier being the one in it than watching it from the outside.
watching the people I love struggle through theirs. To tell you the truth, it was much easier being the one in it than watching it from the outside.
I seem to have been born for this work. Looking back, I see that I trained for it my entire life. The Deslongchamps Method is in my cells, my DNA,
and imprinted on my soul. I spent years living it, breathing air into it. It took me 55 years to be able to write this letter, to know this method, and to
be able to smile at its history—even if it’s just a side smile.
and imprinted on my soul. I spent years living it, breathing air into it. It took me 55 years to be able to write this letter, to know this method, and to
be able to smile at its history—even if it’s just a side smile.
I took every useful teaching that worked for me, and still works today. Although I had several teachers along the way, no single one of them had exactly
what I needed. One may have mastered the psychology of addiction; another great teacher specialized in spontaneous remissions; another was an
epigenetics master; while another was a master of self-preservation. What they all had in common was science and direct, practical experience in their fields.
what I needed. One may have mastered the psychology of addiction; another great teacher specialized in spontaneous remissions; another was an
epigenetics master; while another was a master of self-preservation. What they all had in common was science and direct, practical experience in their fields.
I spent years studying new sciences, biology, and emotional intelligence, finding myself in absolute awe of the world we live in. I learned that I was capable of
change and happiness. None of the specialists I studied could have created this system on their own. I combined the individual teachings of these masters to
build The Deslongchamps Method.
change and happiness. None of the specialists I studied could have created this system on their own. I combined the individual teachings of these masters to
build The Deslongchamps Method.
The Questions
The answers…
- What? What is the problem? What are you escaping from? In order to get clarification to these questions, there’s nowhere else to go but within.
Deep in your cells and your body’s tissues, you will find those answers. If I had learned what addiction truly was earlier in life, I might have cut my
run short. But then again, I now know addiction intimately, having studied it for many decades.
- Why? If you can’t do this for yourself right now, do it for your family. Let them be your reason why, until you can find that reason for yourself. You
or one of your family members can contact us at any time. Even if you are not ready to fully step into this framework today, you can join whenever
you are ready. This is where “better late than never” makes the most sense. However, please remember that your children are getting older. I promise
you with certainty that if they don’t get resolution now, you will start to see yourself in their eyes shortly. By then, it is much harder to resolve.
Look at our family section to find out more.
- Where? I knew that it was unrealistic for many families to just step out of their lives and go to a remote rehab location. That is why we come to you.
We operate anywhere around the globe, directly inside your everyday life, because I understand how critical your continuity is. Our highly trained
specialists are always mobile, utilizing residence partners worldwide to stay nearby and remain completely at your service. Look at our partners in
the personal development space to find out more.
- When? This is the ultimate question to ask yourself: When does it stop? If not now, then when? I waited too long. The trouble with us humans is that
we usually wait for a crisis, a loss, or complete devastation before we choose to change. I can promise you that if you can find a reason that is strong
enough, you will find your when. Please do not think you have time. Don’t wait like I did until it’s too late. “Better late than never” is a true saying,
but it comes with an incredibly heavy price to pay.
- Who? In a world full of pain and suffering, I made the deliberate choice to include the whole family in my programs. While The Deslongchamps Method
accepts individual guests, we truly live for families. I knew you before you even read this letter. One thing I knew for sure is that I couldn’t honestly offer
anyone a real solution without including the whole family unit. Addiction is a family devastation, and it requires a family solution. I will always love the
individual struggling through the storm, but my heart belongs to the families who are dragged into it with them.
- How? I understand how difficult it might be to pick up the phone. I didn’t even have that option; there were no mobile, full-time family programs in
existence when I was looking. I deeply studied the barriers that keep people from seeking help. Because of this, The Deslongchamps Method offers
several pathways for initial communication. Often, the outreach doesn’t come from the individual engaging in harmful behaviors—it comes from a parent,
a spouse, a friend, or even a child. While we require parental agreement from at least one parent to get involved, we make the process seamless.
Unlike traditional programs, we do not require the individual struggling with active addiction to join at the exact same moment as the family.
Our mission is to protect and heal as many family members as possible; they can join our circle whenever they are ready.
True progress begins the moment the family gets onto the right road.
I Hope That You Value What We’ve Built
It was a joint effort.
I will always be honest with you: recovery is different for everyone. The road can be twisty, windy, bendy, and rough. I would be lying if I told you that we
at The Deslongchamps Method had a miracle cure for all of your problems. To be completely honest, even if we did, we would be cheating you out of
the profound experience of the journey—which is an easier thing for me to say now than it was back then.
at The Deslongchamps Method had a miracle cure for all of your problems. To be completely honest, even if we did, we would be cheating you out of
the profound experience of the journey—which is an easier thing for me to say now than it was back then.
The Deslongchamps Method is ruthless, determined, qualified, and able. However, we are only 50% of the solution. Your willingness is the other 50%
of the success. Even then, you may stumble, and you may sometimes fall. The vital thing is to get your children into safety as soon as you can, and to
get your family started on healing—even if it is not through The Deslongchamps Method. The only issue that truly matters is that the trauma does not go
unresolved. Find solutions anywhere you can, and stumble forward behind them.
of the success. Even then, you may stumble, and you may sometimes fall. The vital thing is to get your children into safety as soon as you can, and to
get your family started on healing—even if it is not through The Deslongchamps Method. The only issue that truly matters is that the trauma does not go
unresolved. Find solutions anywhere you can, and stumble forward behind them.
Over the years, I found myself deeply confused by the conventional recovery world and mainstream “luxury rehabs.” I simply couldn’t understand how the
vast majority of these services failed to include the family unit. There is a glaring, well-known barrier regarding people finding the time to leave their careers
and everyday responsibilities to isolate at a center—why was that reality completely ignored? I also regularly saw mismatched dynamics, such as male
professionals working exclusively with female clients and vice versa, which felt entirely counterintuitive. Not to mention the standard 7-to-10-day “treatment”
cycles on offer. I couldn’t comprehend what real restoration could possibly be achieved in that short amount of time. I refuse to believe that their goal was
purely financial; that is not how I wish to see this world, and I still don’t want to believe that!
vast majority of these services failed to include the family unit. There is a glaring, well-known barrier regarding people finding the time to leave their careers
and everyday responsibilities to isolate at a center—why was that reality completely ignored? I also regularly saw mismatched dynamics, such as male
professionals working exclusively with female clients and vice versa, which felt entirely counterintuitive. Not to mention the standard 7-to-10-day “treatment”
cycles on offer. I couldn’t comprehend what real restoration could possibly be achieved in that short amount of time. I refuse to believe that their goal was
purely financial; that is not how I wish to see this world, and I still don’t want to believe that!
We quickly realized that unless someone has experienced the reality of addiction firsthand—either through their own battles or by watching a loved one break—
it is not something that can be taught in a textbook. To truly understand the invisible ghosts, the elusiveness, the deep sadness, the frustration, the anger, and
the complete helplessness, it cannot be bought; it must be lived. Because of this, while our specialists hold elite academic qualifications, we require our full-time
team to have intimately known addiction and successfully flourished beyond it. When our specialists look you in the eye and say, “I understand,” you will know it is true.
it is not something that can be taught in a textbook. To truly understand the invisible ghosts, the elusiveness, the deep sadness, the frustration, the anger, and
the complete helplessness, it cannot be bought; it must be lived. Because of this, while our specialists hold elite academic qualifications, we require our full-time
team to have intimately known addiction and successfully flourished beyond it. When our specialists look you in the eye and say, “I understand,” you will know it is true.
Our services are meticulously structured to be the most effective intervention available.
While we are not the cheapest service in the world, we are the absolute best at what we do.
While we are not the cheapest service in the world, we are the absolute best at what we do.
We also remain fiercely committed to accessibility for those who cannot normally afford our frameworks. Twice a year, we dedicate our full-scale services
entirely to low-income families. Furthermore, our broader mission is to establish a dedicated permanent residential service for families, a vision we are actively
building toward right now.
entirely to low-income families. Furthermore, our broader mission is to establish a dedicated permanent residential service for families, a vision we are actively
building toward right now.
We’re in This Together…
And we are doing just fine…
Throughout our differences, we have stayed a deeply close family. When one of us strays off course, we herd them back in. It is never easy,
but we are relentless. Thankfully, there is a strong anchor keeping us grounded, and that anchor is me. I started this mess, and I will finish it!
but we are relentless. Thankfully, there is a strong anchor keeping us grounded, and that anchor is me. I started this mess, and I will finish it!
It took me many years to forgive myself for hurting my children the way I did, and I still have internal work to do. Pleading ignorance did not save me from the bed
I had to lie in because of the choices I made while they were growing up. Be very careful; I wouldn’t wish that experience on anyone. It has been a long road to
recovery, slipping and sliding down the path, mostly in the dark.
I had to lie in because of the choices I made while they were growing up. Be very careful; I wouldn’t wish that experience on anyone. It has been a long road to
recovery, slipping and sliding down the path, mostly in the dark.
As for us Deslongchamps… some of my children are still refining their strength through their own training at the school of hard knocks, but they are strong,
bright, intelligent people who are going to be great! They know The Deslongchamps Method fundamentally because they lived it, and I would bet the farm
that they will be of service one day through our program.
If I can save just one family from enduring what we went through, then every single mile of this journey was worth it.
Welcome to our world of infinite possibilities.
With love,
Tammy-Anne Deslongchamps
Founder & CEO, The Deslongchamps Method
Founder & CEO, The Deslongchamps Method